This Is Us Premiere: Hilarious, Heartbreaking, and Filled with New Questions

This Is Us Season 3One hour into This Is Us season three and the question remains: Who is her?
Towards the end of tonight’s premiere, we got a little bit more of the scene we saw last season, with an…

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Important Questions to Ask Your Wedding Vendors

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{Photo Credit: Loyall Hart}

Wedding planning can be extremely overwhelming. Some brides know exactly what they want and have known since they were little girls and other brides have no idea what they want. Whichever bride you are, you’re going to be overwhelmed. The internet and social media is saturated with wedding ideas. Hashtag after hashtag, vision board after vision board… There is almost too much information out there. Nowadays, it isn’t enough to just see someone’s work online. You have to really investigate and interview your vendors. Now, before we get into some of the essential tools for hiring wedding vendors, HIRE A WEDDING PLANNER! I’ve never understood people who don’t hire a wedding planner to handle one of the most important days of their lives.

1. Decide what matters the most. I always ask my clients, “What is the most important aspect of your wedding?” I get everything from the cake to the dress to the food. Depending on their answer, we’ll focus more of the budget on that particular want. Often times, there isn’t wiggle room in a budget. Meaning, if your budget is $ 75,000 you don’t have $ 75,000.01. In that case, you’ll have to pull from one item and add it to another in order to make what you want work for the big day.

2. Be specific when searching hashtags. In the age of Pinterest, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, etc, finding the right vendors for your wedding can be overwhelming. Even as a vendor, finding the right hashtag to put your work under is challenging. You have over-saturated categories that don’t always fit the intended need. In a recent conversation with Season Bennett a/k/a The Social Barber, who created a program that generates hashtags based on more concise and specific areas and groups, she stressed the importance of searching detailed hashtags. The more detailed the hashtag, (i.e. city, state, street, landmark) the better your chances are of finding local vendors instead of having to weed through thousands from all over the world in that one group.

3. Do your research. Ask your potential vendors for references. Ask to speak to a few of their previous clients and find out what their experiences were like. One bad review out of 30 isn’t terrible. 1 bad review out of 3 is questionable. Aside from reviews, do your research based on pricing as well. If there is a photographer who you absolutely love and there is one who you just like with a $ 500 difference between the two, pick your favorite. Consult with your planner on how to rework the budget to see where you can cut costs to make up for that extra $ 500.

4. Read the fine print. Every contract has fine print. The most confusing fine print for many of my clients is the venue contract. Luckily for them, I go through and explain the contracts but if you don’t have a planner (WHY DON’T YOU HAVE A PLANNER??!!), make sure to have each vendor explain the entire contract line-by-line.

5. Get options but not too many options. One of the biggest mistakes that I see my clients make is having too much information. Once the planning begins, you’ll drown in wedding information if you’re not careful. Have your planner suggest two options per vendor. You don’t need 10 photographers and 10 videographers because all of that information will be overwhelming and it’s unnecessary.

As a general rule when choosing vendors, if they take a week to respond to your email, they’re probably going to take that long if not longer after you hire them. If that bothers you, as it should, they might not be the vendor for you. Remember that not only will you be working with them on one of the most important days of your life but that you’ll have to deal with them the months leading up to the big day.

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Oculus reacts to virtual reality privacy questions

An executive from virtual reality company Oculus says consumers shouldn’t be concerned about an invasion of their privacy when using the Oculus Rift. Jason Rubin , Oculus’ head of worldwide studios, is downplaying questions raised about the VR system’s privacy policy. “It’s a new medium,” said Rubin during a Thursday interview.

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20 Questions to Ask Before Selling on eBay

20 Questions to Ask Before Selling on eBay


With over 80 million registered eBay users in the English speaking countries, consumers are empowered to buy just about anything at a price that’s fair. And millions have used eBay to either sell some of the stuff lying around the house, or they make a living utilizing this unique online flea market. The two latest additions to the 20 Questions series break the subject of “eBaying” down into two distinct books for two distinct audiences: eBay buyers and eBay sellers. And if readers were to buy both books, they’d have the complete information on how eBay works and how they could make it work for them. 20 Questions To Ask Before Selling on eBay is designed to take anyone through the steps to sell successfully and profitably. Beginning with how to set up an eBay business and organizing it for success, the book proceeds through how to choose the best products, how to design an attractive and effective listing, getting paid, automating auctions, customer service, and more. Both 20 Questions eBay books take readers step-by-step through the process, each chapter building on the information taught. The books are written as a fresh and lively narrative, with plenty of bullets, checklists and useful advice learned from the authors’ experiences. It’s all the information both buyers and sellers need to not only get started, but to do eBay their way! Companion Volume 20 Questions to Ask Before Buying on eBay (ISBN 1-56414-847-5) Lissa McGrath has worked as the assistant to Ski
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3 Questions I Used to Decide to Rock the Grays By a Hair Color Professional

Are you thinking of growing out your grays? I recently started to question my own hair coloring routine that I have relied on to hide my grays and have come to the conclusion that it’s time for me to start rocking my grays.

As an Image Consultant, Color Analysis Professional and Hair Colorist, I developed 3 questions to help guide myself to make this ‘going gray decision’.

I share these 3 questions with you in the video below and hope they help you decide whether growing out your grays may be something that is right for you either now or at some point in the future.

My plan is to share my growing out the grays journey on my YouTube channel over the coming months. To follow my journey, click ‘Subscribe’ at this link: http://www.youtube.com/user/CarolBraileyImage.

The 3 Questions I Used to Decide to Rock the Grays Are (all questions below are detailed further in above video):
1. What are your color analysis results and does gray hair color align to these results?
2. Are you okay with hair color maintenance?
3. Are you ready to truly embrace the grays?

Some people start going gray as early as their teenage years. I believe there are so many negative myths that need to be busted about having natural gray hair. In my opinion, it really is just another hair color option available to many of us at some point in our lives (some earlier than others).

I hope this blog post inspires you to wear your authenticity!

Carol Brailey is an Image Consultant, Color Analysis Professional and Hair Colorist based in Toronto, Canada. More of her blogs can be found at carolbrailey.com and virtualcoloranalysis.com. Carol is a member of the Studio Fontana team located in the Fashion District of downtown Toronto.

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Style – The Huffington Post
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iPhone 37 Success Secrets – 37 Most Asked Questions On iPhone – What You Need To Know

iPhone 37 Success Secrets – 37 Most Asked Questions On iPhone – What You Need To Know


There has never been a iPhone Guide like this. iPhone 37 Success Secrets is not about the ins and outs of iPhone. Instead, it answers the top 37 questions that we are asked and those we come across in our forums, consultancy and education programs. It tells you exactly how to deal with those questions, with tips that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This comprehensive guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces everything you want to know to be successful with iPhone. A quick look inside of the subjects covered: Loopt, Smart YouTube: A WordPress YouTube Plugin that Surely Counts, The e-mail service only supported IMAP access. , Reception, Tesco Clubcard, Music and Audio Sharing, Mobile, Google Wallet, A bird’s eye view of Microsoft’s SkyDrive, Static website vs Dynamic website, 1946, 1992 to 2000, Benefits of Cloud Computing, History, Details of Service, Rise of Mobile Payments, Additional or Custom Features, Control, Mobile Access, Features, Sample Bring Your Own Device Policy and Rules of Behavior, QBE Vivo Pen Computer, Why Is Intellectual Property Management Training Crucial Nowadays? History, 2001 2001, 3 types of Cloud Computing technologies which the average person uses on a daily basis, Box.net, Mobile Me, The benefits of purchasing a complete ITIL certification kit, Services, Google Apps, Additional or Custom Features, MS Office Entourage, Remote Data Deletion, Google Earth: Your Cyber-Friendly Map, The Trend for Mobile Web Analytics, European Youth Card, and much more.

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Ultrabook 104 Success Secrets – 104 Most Asked Questions On Ultrabook – What You Need To Know

Ultrabook 104 Success Secrets – 104 Most Asked Questions On Ultrabook – What You Need To Know


Now available, Ultrabook. There has never been a Ultrabook Guide like this. It contains 104 answers, much more than you can imagine; comprehensive answers and extensive details and references, with insights that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This all-embracing guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces what you want to know about Ultrabook. A quick look inside of some of the subjects covered: Notebook computers – Battery life, Wide VGA – Others, Org-mode – Integration, Intel Active Management Technology, IdeaPad – Yoga 2 Pro, Dell XPS – XPS 13, MacBook Pro – Reception, Eee pc, Laptop computer, Dell XPS – XPS 10, Haswell (microarchitecture) – New features, Asus Eee PC, Aspire One, Lenovo IdeaPad Yoga 13 – Reviews, Laptop – Battery life, Ultrabook, Small appliance – Types and examples, HP Envy – Ultrabook, ThinkPad Helix – Reviews, HP ZBook – Current models, Laptop computer – Netbook, Lenovo IdeaPad Yoga 11 – Reviews, Intel Corporation – Opening up the foundries, Gigabyte Technology – Products, Lenovo IdeaPad U310 – Wireless connectivity issues, American Megatrends – DuOS-M, HP EliteBook – Current models, Desktop computers – Decline, IdeaPad – Series overview, Laptop computer – Subnotebook, Intel AppUp – Intel AppUp developer program, Audience (telecom company) – Background, Zenbook – Zenbook Prime, Lenovo IdeaPad U310 – Ultrabook, Lenovo Thinkpad – ThinkPad Helix, Toshiba Satellite, Asus Products, Next Unit of Computing – Reception and ecosystem, Ultrabook – Specifications, Laptop – Classification, XenClient – Known Limitations, Consumer Electronics Show – Products that debuted at CES, Intel – Opening up the foundries, Gesture recognition – Input devices, M.2, Lenovo IdeaPad Yoga 13 – Awards, and much more.

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24 Questions Black People Need White People To Answer, Like Right Now

“Do y’all really think Miley is the one who created twerking? Really?”

This is just one of “24 Questions Black People Have For White People,” according to a new video released by Buzzfeed.

Five black people pose questions that open dialogue around white privilege, appropriation and more. Some other necessary questions they ask are: “Why is it that white crime is seen as an isolated incident but black crime is a representation of my entire community,” or “Why do you want to say the N-word so badly” and ”Why is it that white people always act as though they’ve discovered a new trend when people of color have been doing it for virtually years?”

White people often appropriate black culture without giving us credit — from slang words we created to the hairstyles we rock – and we want to know why!

See the rest of the questions in the video above.

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Tired Of Baby Questions, This Couple Took Pics With Their Pup Instead

Australian couple Matt Kay and Abby Lee were tired of people asking them when they were going to have kids.

With the the help of their photographer friend Elisha Collins of Elisha Minette Photography, the couple of two years came up with the idea of of doing a newborn-style photo shoot with their canine bundle of joy instead. 

“Our families joke around about when are we having kids,” Abby told The Huffington Post. “We thought the newborn shoot would be a humorous response.”

“We came up with the idea when we were on the long drive home from picking Humphrey up from the groodle (golden retriever-poodle mix) breeder,” Elisha told HuffPost. “Abby and I have the craziest sense of humor and we feed off of each other with ideas.” 

 

The pictures of the impossibly photogenic pup and his fur parents began to go viral after Elisha posted them to her Facebook page earlier this week. 

 

“We did this shoot just for a little bit of humor between ourselves and our closest family and friends that have the same sense of humor as us,” she said. “We did not expect this to get as big as it has.”

Elisha stressed that the photo session was not intended to make fun of new parents or those who enjoying sharing about their kids on social media. 

“This was just clean, simple Sunday afternoon fun,” she added. 

H/T BuzzFeed

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Basic Etiquette Questions No. 2: Test Yourself!

Number 2 on my list of “most asked” etiquette questions includes both business and social quandaries and how to address them. Test yourself by going through this list, then look for the answers in my next weeks post, Real & Simple No. 2: Answers to Your Most Basic Etiquette Questions.

• Is the continental style of eating (fork in the left hand, knife in the right if you’re right-handed, and the opposite for lefties) considered correct in the United States?

• Is it okay to arrive late to a dinner party?

• If hosting a lunch for a client, should you choose the location?

• If your friend is disabled, is it okay to ask if he or she needs help?

• Can you use either a fork or a spoon to eat dessert?

• At a formal table setting, what is the correct height for a centerpiece?

• In a formal business letter, is it okay to use the honorific Dear Sir?

• Is the maître d’ in charge of the kitchen?

• When you arrive for a business meeting, is it okay to ask for coffee?

• When greeting a client in a restaurant, should you take the lead or let the maître d’ seat the client?

Lisa Mirza Grotts is a recognized etiquette expert, an on-air contributor, and the author of A Traveler’s Passport to Etiquette. She is a former director of protocol for the city and county of San Francisco and the founder and CEO of The AML Group (Lisagrotts.com), certified etiquette and protocol consultants. Her clients range from Stanford Hospital to Cornell University and Levi Strauss. She has been quoted by Condé Nast Traveler, InStyle magazine, the Los Angeles Times, and the New York Times. To learn more about Lisa, follow her on Twitter.com/LisaGrotts and Facebook.com/LisaGrotts.

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Style – The Huffington Post
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Internet and Computer Law: Cases, Comments, Questions

Internet and Computer Law: Cases, Comments, Questions


Used – Contains the key cases on Internet and computer law, including Altai and Napster as well as newer cases such as Grokster, Rescuecom v. Google and a discussion of the Google Books settlement. The patents chapter provides thorough coverage of the patentability of software, computer-implemented business methods, and Internet techniques. The chapters of the book are fully independent, allowing law teachers to design a course suiting their preferences and tailored to the number of available cl

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Hilarious Black Dude Answers White People’s Most Burning Questions

“Have you ever had a question you wanted to ask the one black friend that you know, but refrained because you didn’t want to run the risk of sounding racist?” 

That’s the question Gabriel Green asked at the College Union Poetry Slam Invitational finals  in March. Green, a student at Eastern Michigan University, gives hilarious responses to common mysteries he assumes white people are dying to solve. For example, why are black people so good at basketball? 

His explanations are funny, but also serve to demystify the black experience for his white peers.

On his list of questions is, “Do black people hate all white people?” to which Green says, “Of course we don’t, we just hate the people who perpetuate or refuse to acknowledge the history of social, political, and racial f**kery placed against us.”

And yes, Green reminds white audience members, if you have to ask if something is racist… it is. 

The competition included several other talented poets that performed pieces about the challenges of black experience. Head over to Button Poetry to watch those. 

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Arts – The Huffington Post
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The 5 Questions Brides Ask Most About Etiquette, Answered by the Emily Post Institute

From the moment you get engaged until you receive your last wedding present, etiquette questions abound for the bride-to-be. Some are classics that decades of women have asked, while others are completely new for our…


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Human Resources Management 77 Success Secrets – 77 Most Asked Questions On Human Resources Management – What You Need To Know

Human Resources Management 77 Success Secrets – 77 Most Asked Questions On Human Resources Management – What You Need To Know


Here it is: Human Resources Management! There has never been a Human Resources Management Guide like this. It contains 77 answers, much more than you can imagine; comprehensive answers and extensive details and references, with insights that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This all-embracing guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces what you want to know about Human Resources Management. A quick look inside of some of the subjects covered: National Association of Industrial Technology – Definitions, Joseph M. Katz Graduate School of Business – Traditional two-year MBA, HEC Montreal – Academic departments, Master of Science in Management, Electronic business Subsets, Operative Professional – Exam, procedure and content, ESS – Other uses, Professional in Human Resources – Preparation, Aspiration Management – Personnel Management – Human Resource Management – Human Capital Management – Aspiration Management, Work engagement – Work engagement as a unique concept, E-Business – Subsets, Agency shop, Lean IT – Proliferation of Online Transactions, U.S. Customs and Border Protection – Structure, Certified Business Manager – Content, RAF – Branches and trades, Certified Compensation Professional, Enterprise relationship management – Overview, Career ladder, Humanitarian aid – Standards, Association of Technology, Management, and Applied Engineering – Definitions, AAFT – Asian Business School, Canada Wide Media Limited – Magazines, Bachelor’s degree – Business and management, Advice (opinion) – Background Information, Legal management, Coercive monopoly – Unions, Chillicothe, Ohio – Education, Closed shop, Certified Research Administrator – General Management, Menlo College – Academics, SAP AG Products, Agency fee, Human resource management system, and much more.

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Watch ‘OITNB’ Stars Hilariously React To Sexist Interview Questions

Uzo Aduba, Natasha Lyonne and Samira Wiley know exactly how to answer some very boring and very sexist interview questions.

The three “Orange Is The New Black” stars sat down with Brazilian comedian Rafael Cortez on June 15 at Netflix junket and reacted to his sexist questions like the champs that they are. From Aduba’s face to Lyonne’s fierce response to a seriously sexist question — it’s clear these ladies don’t take sh*t from anyone.

Telling by their faces, the women were a bit taken aback at first:

Cortez begins the interview by asking Aduba if she thinks the series needs “a guy inside the jail with [her] doing things that just one guy can be able to do.” When Aduba quickly points out that there are indeed men in the show, Cortez replies: “No I mean guys, men, roar! Do you see my muscles? Would you like to see?” To which she says, “No.”

He continues on his weird, sexist, ambiguously satirical interview when he asked Lyonne and Wiley if their beauty gets in the way of their work. Lyonne was definitely having some trouble answering the question — or for that matter, believing it was even real. “I feel like [the question] is accidentally maybe a little bit misogynistic,” she told Cortez.

“Despite great beauty on the show, everybody is professional and talented and very capable,” Lyonne went on. “So I don’t think that really anybody is really thinking about something as meaningless as their beauty when they’re at work or certainly not this show.”

Shut. Down.

H/T Cosmopolitan

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Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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You Asked?: Over 300 Great Questions And Astounding Answers

You Asked?: Over 300 Great Questions And Astounding Answers


When originally published in 1996, You Asked? was picked as one of the year''s Best Science Books by the American Academy for the Advancement of Science. In 2002 it was one of the Canadian Toy Testing Council''s 25 Great Books for Children.
Perfect for travelling, babysitting, spring break or rainy days, You Asked? represents 20 years of questions from the readers of Owl magazine. The book is packed with questions and answers that will keep young readers amused for hours, such as Why do jumping beans jump? Answer: Because there''s something alive inside! A jumping bean is the seed of a Mexican shrub, with a moth larva inside it. When the seeds are left in a warm place, the larva starts to move, causing the jumping bean to jump and tumble …
Answers are delightfully concise and jargon-free. -Toronto Star
A stimulating science and nature resource for the inquisitive reader. -Quill & Quire
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Phablet 44 Success Secrets – 44 Most Asked Questions On Phablet – What You Need To Know

Phablet 44 Success Secrets – 44 Most Asked Questions On Phablet – What You Need To Know


There has never been a Phablet Guide like this. It contains 44 answers, much more than you can imagine; comprehensive answers and extensive details and references, with insights that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This all-embracing guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces what you want to know about Phablet. A quick look inside of some of the subjects covered: Samsung Galaxy Note II, Word of the Year – Least Likely to Succeed, Samsung Galaxy Note series – Galaxy Note II, Samsung Galaxy Gear – Development, Samsung Galaxy Grand – Reception, Samsung Galaxy Note (original) – Size and construction, Dell Streak, Samsung Electronics, Samsung Galaxy Duos – Range, LG Vu 3, Global Language Monitor – High tech terms, EO Personal Communicator, Samsung Galaxy Mega, Smartphones – Origin of the term, Smartphone – Origin of the term, LG Optimus Vu, Lenovo smartphones – Vibe Z, LG Optimus G Pro, Huawei Ascend Mate, 2160p – History, Tablet computer – Phablets, LG Optimus Vu II, Nokia Lumia 1520, Phablet – History, Samsung Galaxy Note 8.0, HTC One Max – History, Nokia Lumia 1320, Samsung Galaxy Tab series – Galaxy Note, Alcatel One Touch – Smartphones, Asus Fonepad, Phablet – Market impact, Mobile phone form factors – Touchscreen/Phablet, and much more.

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Alienware 73 Success Secrets – 73 Most Asked Questions On Alienware – What You Need To Know

Alienware 73 Success Secrets – 73 Most Asked Questions On Alienware – What You Need To Know


Takes A Fresh Look At Alienware. There has never been a Alienware Guide like this. It contains 73 answers, much more than you can imagine; comprehensive answers and extensive details and references, with insights that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This all-embracing guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces what you want to know about Alienware. A quick look inside of some of the subjects covered: Dell Acquisitions, Product placement – Consumer electronics and computers, AVADirect – Reviews, Astro Studios, Dell XPS – XPS 730X H2C, Alienware – Desktops, Alienware – Laptops, Compal Electronics – Overview, Ubuntu Linux – Vendor support, AVADirect – Competitors, Dell Competition, IdeaPad Y Series – Y410p, Gigabyte Technology – History, Computer display – Curved designs, QuickPlay, Quad FX – System builders, QuakeCon – 2008, Dell, Inc. – Manufacturing, Mobile PCI Express Module, Dell XPS – XPS M1730, Case Western Reserve University Computing, Dell, Inc. – Competition, Clarksfield (microprocessor), Origin PC, Dell XPS – History, Dell Growth in 1990s and early 2000s, The Hammocks, Florida – Economy, Dell, Inc. – Scope and brands, History of Dell – Dell and AMD, Personal computers – Gaming computer, History of Dell – Background and origins, Dell Manufacturing, Gaming PC – Gaming laptop computers, Falcon Northwest – Competitors, List of computer system manufacturers – Current, Natus Vincere – History, Origin PC – Competitors, Wide VGA – UXGA (1600×1200), Notebook computers – Major brands and manufacturers, Vaio – Technology, LAN party – Sponsorship, Liquid-cooled engine – Computer usage, Dell, Inc. – Dell 2.0 and downsizing, Dell, Inc. – Growth in 1990s and early 2000s, Sony Vaio – Technology, and much more.

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Collector Spotlight: 10 Questions for Brussels’ Frederic de Goldschmidt

2015-05-20-1432145133-1223064-1.DeGoldschmidt.jpg

By Constance Breton, May 20, 2015

On the occasion of the 33rd edition of Art Brussels, one of Europe’s most popular contemporary art fairs, we caught up with Frédéric de Goldschmidt, an influential yet discreet, French collector living in the Belgium capital.

De Goldschmidt actively supports international and local emerging artists through his collection and involvement in many artistic happenings around the city. This has established him as one of the key players of the Brussels art scene, where he keeps and shares his collection, by appointment. He sat down with us to answer 10 Questions about his “eye” and vision for collecting.

Q: When and why did you start collecting art ?

de Goldschmidt: I bought my first pieces of artwork when I was a teenager. They were two prints, one by Hans Hartung, one by Zao Wou-ki. The first original piece of contemporary art I bought with serious consideration was a work by Benjamin Sabatier in 2007. I had seen a work at FIAC that was sold and I wrote down the day of his next opening in order for me to be there at the beginning of the opening – which I successfully did. The work was made with ice cube trays filed with crumpled magazine pages. A few months later, I decided to take a year off and spend my time visiting museums, exhibitions, art fairs. It was my grandmother who made me appreciate art and she was a collector, so I decided to « recycle » into art part of my inheritance from her. It is a kind of homage. I hope I’ll be able to transmit a taste and a collection to my grandchildren too… And in the meantime to be challenged by art and artists.

Q: Is your collection more based on the subject rather than a certain artistic movement ?

de Goldschmidt: Works from the ZERO group and related artists of the 60s were among my first acquisitions during my “sabbatical.” I don’t follow a concept, but I keep a strong attraction to the simple and unconventional materials they used: cardboard with Schoonhoven, nails with Uecker, corks with Henderikse, styrofoam balls with Manzoni, I appreciate contemporary artists with the same inspiration. I buy works that speak to me more than I follow than artists or movements.

Q: What are the key artists in your collection ?

de Goldschmidt:I started collecting works that struck me when I was only visiting museums and shows. I was sensible to Arte Povera in Italy, so I bought works by Alighiero Boetti, a large piece by Kounellis,…One of my first major acquisition of a 21st century artist was a piece by Mike Kelley, a very multifaceted artist whose Memory wares particularly attracted me. I now concentrate on current production, works out of studio. The names of the artists will hopefully be recognized in a few years.

Q: Do you collect any kind of mediums, including video and performance ?

de Goldschmidt: I have a problem with video because I am not patient enough to set up the equipment, sit down and stay quiet for 20 minutes… And I don’t even own a TV… I nevertheless bought my first video, by Amélie Bouvier, this year, because it was a large edition and at a low price. I think that videos should be published as they were at the beginning, without limitation, and sold at a reasonable price, like a DVD or a film on iTunes. More people could thus look at them on their computer when they have some free time. I would like to collect performance, it is easier to store but it is even more difficult to show…

Q: You are very close to young artists and often support them. Do you consider it is important to be in contact with tomorrow’s artists and help them develop ?

de Goldschmidt: Yes, this is part of what I consider a duty: use part my grandmother’s inheritance to support contemporary creators. It makes much more sense to buy the work of a young artist who must eat today…than from a dead collector. In a period when state support is diminishing, collectors could take over part of this responsibility.

Q: You regularly organize exhibitions of your collection’s works, on the occasion of which you work with emerging curators. Can you talk about the show “Break it out!” organized by Julian Elias Bronner and Benjamin Faust on the occasion of the Art Brussels fair ?

de Goldschmidt: I asked two young New Yorkers, Julian Elias Bronner, an art journalist and Benjamin Faust Weber, an artist, to build a show around a piece by Alighiero e Boetti, “Zig zag,” and draw some lines between this sculpture made of a multi-color lounge chair and aluminum and other works from my collection, They tried to push a bit the aesthetic framework of the collection by inviting young Belgian or American artists not (yet…) represented in the collection. I am very happy with it.

Q: Last year, you contributed to the exhibition “Stalactica” and you took part in the funding of a monumental piece of art made by the artist trio Clairenadiasimon at the CAB. Were you involved in other events this year during Art Brussels?

de Goldschmidt: No production this year, but I was involved in three shows : “Break Out!” at my space, “Do you have barbaric taste?” at Poppositions with over 40 works and I also lent a work to a show of Japanese art curated by Nathalie Guiot at Hangar18.
“Do you have barbaric taste?” was organized by the young curators, Les Commissaires Anonymes and Nicolas de Ribou, who wanted to bring together a selection of works acquired for less than 8,000 euros over the past 10 years from a group of five Brussels-based collectors. They wanted to combine established and emerging artists to reflect on the role of collectors as defining cultural judgments and forming artistic hierarchies. It should be quite exciting to see how the rearrangement of our collections will look like -for us and for the public.

Q: You took part in the Solo prize as a juror, which rewards an artist’s ambitious project. How do you relate to Art Brussels?

de Goldschmidt: Art Brussels is great and I believe it is important to support your hometown fair. Though I am French, Brussels is where I keep and show my collection. It is thus a responsibility to show the best possible images to foreign visitors, galleries, and artists by attracting and rewarding those who make the effort of putting together an ambitious booth.

Q: You are a very active and hard-working collector. What are your basic ideas for collecting art?

de Goldschmidt: Collecting art is both an impulsive egotistic pleasure and an altruistic social responsibility. It is fun to acquire and keep in your home a work in which an artist has put all his feelings and savoir faire. But it is a responsibility not to keep it for yourself and to maintain it for the future generations. Collectors need to help art to be made by acquiring works from the artists of their time and also be custodians for the future .

Q: What do you think the role of a collector is in the making of art history ?

de Goldschmidt: Collectors give artists the mean to create the works. The variety of taste among collectors should allow all artists to express themselves. Collectors (like all those who look at art) can see things that artists don’t even see in their works – and make them look better by creating a dialogue them with works by other artists. But it is what the viewers of the future will see in today’s works that will decide if they made it into art history – and if the collector did.

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Constance Breton is an ARTPHAIRE contributor. She is also a the founder of The Art of this Century, which is a platform that offers bespoke experiences and journeys in the art world for a private community of members.


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Arts – The Huffington Post
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Countdown to Baby: Answers to the 100 Most Asked Questions about Pregnancy and Childbirth

Countdown to Baby: Answers to the 100 Most Asked Questions about Pregnancy and Childbirth


Offering a valuable collection of questions most commonly asked by her patients, Dr. Warhus provides straightforward answers to issues that almost every pregnant woman has on her mind. Questions run the gamut from how to cope with morning sickness, indigestion, and acne to the pros and cons of C-sections, the risks of pre-eclampsia and hypertension, and managing pain during labor. Topics covered include selecting the best doctor; the benefits of midwives; the role of a doula in the birthing process; treatments for morning sickness; over-the-counter medications for colds and headaches; restrictions to exercise; advances in 3D and 4D ultrasounds; and labor concerns.

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Pass the ASVAB: Complete Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery Study Guide and Practice Questions

Pass the ASVAB: Complete Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery Study Guide and Practice Questions


Complete ASVAB study guide, with over 500 practice questions, prepared by a dedicated team of exam experts, with everything you need to pass the ASVAB! Pass the ASVAB! will help you: Learn faster Practice with 2 complete practice question sets (over 500 questions) Identify your strengths and weaknesses quickly Concentrate your study time Increase your score with multiple choice strategies from exam experts Learn what you MUST do in the exam room Avoid common mistakes on a test Answer multiple choice questions strategically Increase your vocabulary fast with powerful learning strategies Make a ASVAB study plan and study schedule Includes tutorials and practice test questions for: General Science Arithmetic Reasoning Word Knowledge Paragraph Comprehension Auto and Shop Mathematics Knowledge Mechanical Comprehension Electronics Extensive (hundreds of pages) review and tutorials on all topics Also included in this comprehensive ASVAB resource, are TWO critical chapters to your exam success: How to Take a Test – The Complete Guide – Let’s face it: test-taking is really not easy! While some people seem to have thenatural ability to know what to study, how to absorb and retain information, and how to stay calm enough while actually taking a test to earn a great score, most of us find taking tests to be sheer misery. This is one of the most important chapters! Here you will find out: How to Take a Test – The basics In the Test Room – What you MUST do The Ultimate Guide to Test Preparation – Everything you need to know Common Mistakes on a Test – And how to avoid them Mental Prep – How to psych yourself up for a test Multiple Choice Secrets – learn and practice multiple choice strategies prepared by test experts! Learn a step-by-step method for answering multiple choice questions on any exam, and then 12 strategies, with practice questions for each strategy.

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Mashup 21 Success Secrets – 21 Most Asked Questions On Mashup – What You Need To Know

Mashup 21 Success Secrets – 21 Most Asked Questions On Mashup – What You Need To Know


There has never been a Mashup Guide like this. Mashup 21 Success Secrets is not about the ins and outs of Mashup. Instead, it answers the top 21 questions that we are asked and those we come across in our forums, consultancy and education programs. It tells you exactly how to deal with those questions, with tips that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This comprehensive guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces everything you want to know to be successful with Mashup. A quick look inside of the subjects covered: The Anatomy of DJ Mashups, Locate Your Map Mashups, Web Mashups for Mapping, Join the Unique Music Beat of Flounder’s Mashup, Downloading Mashups Effectively, What Is a Mashup? Types of Mashups, Mashups Rock: Definition And Its Future, Famous Best Mashups On The Internet, The Evolving Web 2.0 and Mashup Technologies, Music Video Remix with MTV Mashups, Better Information Sharing with Mashup Wiki, Ways to Get Free Mashups, The Historical Background of Enterprise Mashups, A Thrilling tour in the mashups.com site, Flickr Mashups: Revealing the Wonders of Wiley’s Aptitude, How Web 2.0 Mashups Help Websites to Become User-oriented? What makes up the best mashups? How To Create Personal Web Video Mashups On Omnisio, Mashup Defined for the Web, Data Mashups: Emerging Potential Applications To Various Social Network Systems, Educational and Sch, and much more.

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Lauren Conrad Answers All Your Pressing Wedding Style Questions

You don’t need to be on Pinterest to get a ton of style, cooking and decorating inspiration. You just need to follow Lauren Conrad on Instagram. And if you’re a bride-to-be, then LC is like the ultimate wedding fairy. The designer recently opened up at Martha Stewart’s Wedding Party event in Chicago (alongside the Martha Stewart Weddings Editorial Director Darcy Miller) about the do’s and don’ts of bridal party dressing, the inspiration behind her Paper Crown bridesmaids dress collection and the totally amazing gift she gave to guests at her September 2014 nuptials to William Tell. (Brides, you should probably bookmark this immediately.)
Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Study Questions Accuracy of Many Breast Cancer Biopsies

Abnormal cells are misidentified in one-fourth of cases, research suggests
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Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas 163 Success Secrets – 163 Most Asked Questions On Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas – What You Need To Know

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas 163 Success Secrets – 163 Most Asked Questions On Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas – What You Need To Know


THE Guide to Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. There has never been a Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas Guide like this. It contains 163 answers, much more than you can imagine; comprehensive answers and extensive details and references, with insights that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This all-embracing guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces what you want to know about Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. A quick look inside of some of the subjects covered: Where the Buffalo Roam – Production, Drug culture – Overview, No Worries (Lil Wayne song) – Music video, My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic fandom – History, Magic Carpet Ride (Steppenwolf song) – In popular culture, Darren Aronofsky – Themes and influences, Mama Told Me Not to Come – Soundtrack appearances, Ether addiction – Literature, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas – Reactions to the novel, Raoul Duke – Portrayals in other media, Ralph Steadman – Career, Benicio del Toro – Career, Rob Bottin – Filmography, Craig Bierko – Filmography, Johnny Depp, Lyle Lovett – Actor, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (film), Sunglasses – Teashades, Hunter S. Thompson – Theater, Cameo appearance – Actors and writers, Hunter S. Thompson – Accolades and tributes, Christopher Meloni – Other work, Flea (musician) – Filmography, Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail, Kingman, Arizona – In films, Oscar Zeta Acosta, Michael Balzary, Strange Rumblings in Aztlan, Noel Gallagher – Liam Gallagher, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas – Origins, Psychedelic literature – Subjective effects of psychedelic drugs, Theatre503 – History, Solvent abuse – Films, WGA screenwriting credit system – Conflict and resolution examples, Ralph Steadman – Partial bibliography, Honorary doctorate – Practical use, Hunter S. Thompson – Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, and much more.

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Study Questions Benefits of Treadmill Desks

They add about 1,000 steps to a user’s day; at least one exercise specialist sees some value to the devices
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SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN!-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News-
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50 Questions We Had While Watching ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’

Watching “Fifty Shades of Grey” in a massive theater surrounded by 100-plus New York media types was An Experience.

There was some titillation, a moderate amount of cringing and a surprising number of moments that elicited genuine laughter. In spite all of the warranted critique of the film’s theme, the terribly-written source material and its disappointingly male-gazey execution, “Fifty Shades” is actually pretty damn fun to watch.

More than anything, the film left us with quite a few burning questions (very few of which have anything to do with sex):

1. Why does Jamie Dornan look so bored the whole time?

2. Are pencils always phallic?

3. Is it really appropriate for a journalism student to make her roommate do an interview for her?

4. Couldn’t Ana’s roommate have just done a phone interview? Or Skyped?

5. Why do people keep taking Ana’s food?

6. Why do Ana and Christian leave the beautiful sushi that was served to them untouched?

7. What is on the “pre-approved list of foods” mentioned in Ana and Christian’s contract?

8. But, seriously, does anyone in this movie actually eat?

9. Is the real problem that they’re just “hangry”?

10. Can Ana name a Black Keys song, or does she just wear a Black Keys T-shirt for the street cred?

fifty shades of grey

11. How many graphic tees can one college girl own?

12. What was her thesis about?

13. Why does Ana have a flip phone?

14. Why won’t Christian buy Ana a better phone, but he’ll buy her a Macbook? (Like, seriously, girl needs some apps and some iMessage.)

15. Should we start using “Do you sell cable ties” as a pickup line?

16. Do you really need to tell someone “you’re not the woman for me” after having one cup of coffee?

17. How do Ana and her roommate afford such a nice apartment?

18. Do they have jobs?

19. Has anyone else in the history of the world been that excited to go to Seattle?

fifty shades of grey

20. Is the Seattle tourism bureau celebrating the sexy rep this movie has brought to their rainy city?

21. Why is Ana’s inbox completely empty except for three emails from Christian?

22. What actually comes up when you Google “submissive”? *Immediately googles “submissive.”*

23. Is saying “No escaping now,” supposed to be murdery or sexy?

24. Where is the line between “making love” and “f**king hard”?

25. Why would anyone have a business meeting in the dark? Editing contracts under mood lighting might seem sexier, but it would also make it impossible to read words.

26. How does Christian know what bar Ana is at with her friends — and which restaurant she’s at with her mom?

27. Is he telepathic?

28. Does Christian break into Ana’s apartment after she breaks up with him? (Because… creepy.)

29. Isn’t losing your virginity generally an awkward experience — especially when a man is ramming into you with disturbingly little foreplay?

fifty shades of grey

30. Why aren’t there more movies that show female pubic hair, leg hair and arm hair? (Spoiler alert: It exists! And we actually see a bit of it in “Fifty Shades.”)

31. Since when is it acceptable (or romantic) to surprise sell someone’s car?

32. Why are we allowed to see so much boob and so little dick in R-rated movies? Huh, MPAA? We’re lookin’ at you.

33. Is riding in a glider super fun… Or is it exactly how you die?

34. Can Marcia Gay Harden be our mom?

35. How much wine can one really baby-bird feed to another person? (Seems wasteful… and sticky.)

36. Should we insist on being carried out of the bedroom like a wounded animal and/or Ariana Grande after having sex?

37. Did Jamie Dornan have a butt double?

38. If so, can we have his number? If not… well done, sir.

39. Does anyone even drink Cosmos anymore? They’re oh-so “Sex and the City.”

fifty shades of grey

40. Is “Laters, baby” the world’s least sexy sign-off?

41. Has any real person ever said “Laters, baby”? (If so… never do it again.)

42. How exactly does one become “50 shades of f**ked up”?

43. Where did Christian learn to fishtail braid?

44. Which is a better arm workout: Blowdrying your hair or being cuffed to the ceiling?

45. Can being stroked with a riding crop really make someone cum?

46. Are we really supposed to believe that BDSM is only for people who have tragic backstories? Because that’s bullsh*t.

47. Can Beyoncé sing in the background every time we have sex from now on?

48. But, actually, where can we purchase the “Fifty Shades” soundtrack?

49. Just how awkward was it to film this movie?

50. And most importantly… Will Ana actually eat solid FOOD in the sequel?

fifty shades of grey


Comedy – The Huffington Post
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How to Be a Lesbian: Our Burning Questions Answered

2015-02-05-SneakersonaPier3.jpg

I’ve been learning how to be a lesbian lately, because my boyfriend and I opened our relationship last year.

“Open relationship,” for us, means we’re still committed to each other but also date other people. So I get to be a lesbian sometimes, and he gets to be, um, the same. But with more sex.

Ten productive months into being a sometimes-lesbian, I still have a lot of questions. So I reached out to Natashia Mower, this lesbian I know personally,* to set me, well, gay, I guess.

Dana: Where can I find the best vests? Is there a special store online?

Natashia: You don’t actually find the best vests; the best vests find you. Be patient; it’ll happen. My favorite vest didn’t find me until I had been out of the closet for almost six years. (Things would’ve been so much easier if the vest had been in the closet I came out of.)

Dana: How short does my hair have to be before they’ll know I’m gay? What styles read “bicurious”?

Natashia: This is heavily debated in the gay community, so I can only give you my personal opinion. Sideburns are tricky and will most likely indicate “straight” or “bicurious.” Trust me; I’ve been side-burned too many times thinking a girl was gay just because she had short hair with sideburns. In my experience, the best method to ensure your hair clearly defines your sexuality is to find a photograph of your father from the late ’70s and go with whatever haircut he had at the time.

Dana: Can my dog be any kind of mutt, or does it have to be a purebred German shepherd?

Natashia: You won’t be kicked out of the lesbians if you have a mutt; we find any breed or mix of breeds acceptable. German shepherds are only so common amongst gay women because they’re like the lesbians of dogs: loyal, capable and they look great in vests. Again, German shepherds aren’t a requirement. It is preferred that you at least have a pet of some kind: dog, cat, gerbil, ant farm, algae, etc. For the record, ferrets are very in right now.

Dana: Is there a class I can take on “EDM for Introverts,” or is that something you just learn from the other lesbians?

Natashia: Well, I hope there’s a class, because I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about right now. I guess I’m just too busy being home alone, avoiding everyone and everything. By the way, can you recommend any good music?

Dana: What is the easiest way to locate my nearest Whole Foods?

Natashia: Get yourself a GPS (gay-positioning system) off of Amazon, $ 35. It will point you towards the nearest Whole Foods, Lady Foot Locker and the renovated garage where my ex-girlfriend Trinity grooms homeless dogs.

Dana: Is there a cheaper version of Birkenstocks? (How is a barista supposed to afford those?)

Natashia: Stirkenbocks, found at Payless, Shoe Carnival and some farmer’s markets. They are very uncomfortable. Stirkenbocks!

Dana: How long into a first date should I wait to give her a key to my apartment?

Natashia: Immediately, if not before the date. If that’s too fast for you, judge based on how the date is going. For example, if the date is going well, give her the key right before you order your food. You may have a love-at-first-sight scenario, in which case you will want to have come prepared with what’s referred to as a “bouquet of keys” (a key ring with a copy of every key you have), a romantic tradition started by lesbian janitors.

Dana: Tofu, tempei, seitan: Which really tastes like chicken?

Natashia: This is a common misconception wherein people confuse gay women with people who have money. I don’t have money. Is the answer chicken? Chicken tastes like chicken.

Dana: So that I’m not lost in a conversation, what are some of the must-know fanfic sites?

Natashia: FictionElle, FictionEllen and FictionL-Word are the three most popular and are currently part of various lawsuits against each other, for obvious reasons.

Dana: How many bumper stickers is too many — or too few?

Natashia: Quality over quantity, I say. If you pull up to a coffee shop or lesbian bar in a Subaru that is plastered in a variety of bumper stickers, the only thing it will say about you is that you couldn’t afford a new paint job. Think very carefully about your personal values, opinions and which secondhand bookstore you most want to advertise for.

Dana: Are there great trails for hiking anywhere in the U.S., or do I need to move west to be a lesbian?

Natashia: When you’re a lesbian, you can hike anywhere. As long as you’re a homosexual lady walking outside, it counts. It’s called dykeing.

Dana: Now that I’m a lesbian, will I still get into Heaven — sorry, Sheaven?

Natashia: As long as you never renounce your lesbianism and never murder anyone, you will most likely get into Sheaven. Heaven, on the other hand, isn’t a real place.

*No we’re not sleeping together. But you’re right; that would be hot.

Natashia Mower is a stand-up comedian from Salt Lake City. She was recently nominated for a Salt Lake City Weekly Arty Award for best local stand-up and moved into her parents’ garage around the same time. Follow her on Twitter @tashiamo.

Dana Sitar is still not sure how to dance to EDM. You can find more stories and resources from her at WritersBucketList.com.
Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Last. fm 152 Success Secrets – 152 Most Asked Questions On Last. fm – What You Need To Know

Last. fm 152 Success Secrets – 152 Most Asked Questions On Last. fm – What You Need To Know


Last. fm like never before. There has never been a Last. fm Guide like this. It contains 152 answers, much more than you can imagine; comprehensive answers and extensive details and references, with insights that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This all-embracing guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces what you want to know about Last. fm. A quick look inside of some of the subjects covered: Amarok (software) – Amarok 2.0, Tag cloud – Frequency, Online identity management, Amarok (software) – Changes since 1.4, MediaPortal, Myspace.com – Music, GNU Free Documentation License List of projects that use the GFDL, East London Tech City – History, Last. fm – Tags, RealPlayer – Plug-ins, Ghosts I-IV – Sales and chart performance, Recommendation systems – Overview, CBS Corporation – 2007, MUZU. TV, Last. fm – Audioscrobbler plugin, Last. fm – Radio stations, Spotify – Last. fm integration, Last. fm – Funding and staff, Quod Libet (software), Nightingale (software) – Notable features, MusicBee – Features, King Syze, CBS Radio – Recent Actions, Last. fm – Website and desktop application redesigns (2012-present), Spotify – Third-party clients and libraries, List of Last. fm number-one songs of the 2000s, Rhythmbox – Last. fm support, Plex (software) – Plex Home Theater, Last. fm – Artist pages, Media Center (software application), Last. fm – Audioscrobbler and Last. fm (2002-2006), Michael Breidenbruecker – Last. fm, CNET News – CNET.com sections, XBMC – Audio, video, and pictures playback and handling, The Planets – Non-orchestral arrangements, Last. fm – Music catalogue, Collective Bargaining (album) – Track listing, Banshee (music player), Last. fm – Recommendations, List of social networking websites, and much more.

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Ciena 32 Success Secrets – 32 Most Asked Questions on Ciena – What You Need to Know

Ciena 32 Success Secrets – 32 Most Asked Questions on Ciena – What You Need to Know


Used – Ciena Corporation’ is a United States-based worldwide provider of electronic communications networking outfits, code and facilities that aid the conveyance and conveyance of vocal, audiovisual and information facilities. Its articles are applied within electronic communications networks controlled by electronic communications facility suppliers, wire operatives, administrations and businesses. The corporation was set up in 1992 and is headofficed in Hanover, Maryland. There has never been

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5 Major Questions We Need Answered From Last Night’s Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce

Vegas, baby, was at the heart of last night's Girlfriend Guide to Divorce. And usually what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but we actually took home a ton of questions that need answers! It…




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Applications 355 Success Secrets – 355 Most Asked Questions On Applications – What You Need To Know

Applications 355 Success Secrets – 355 Most Asked Questions On Applications – What You Need To Know


Applications is here! There has never been a Applications Guide like this. It contains 355 answers, much more than you can imagine; comprehensive answers and extensive details and references, with insights that have never before been offered in print. Get the information you need-fast! This all-embracing guide offers a thorough view of key knowledge and detailed insight. This Guide introduces what you want to know about Applications. A quick look inside of some of the subjects covered: Electric double-layer capacitor – Applications, Amplitude amplification – Applications, Web 2.0 – Web-based applications and desktops, Macro (computer science) Applications, Assembly language Typical applications, Selective laser sintering – Materials and applications, Data mining Commercial data-mining software and applications, Carbon dioxide – Agricultural and biological applications, Fibonacci number – Applications, Lexical analysis – Applications, Inheritance (object-oriented programming) – Applications, Display aspect ratio – Productivity applications, Solar sail – Applications, Ignitron – Applications, Global Positioning System – Applications, Business transaction management – Applications, Remote control – Remote control applications on mobile devices, Moblin – Applications, Cadmium – Applications, Neon sign – Applications, Thermal imaging – Applications, 3D printing – Applications, Contents – Possible applications, Germanium – Applications, Desktop publishing – DTP applications, Cerium – Applications, OLED – Samsung applications, Radar – Applications, Chemical engineering – Applications and practice, Social networking service – Finance applications, InfiniBand – Applications, Open Mobile Terminal Platform – Wholesale Applications Community, Braid theory – Applications, Image scanner Applications Programming Interface, and much more.

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The Knot Ultimate Wedding Planner [Revised Edition]: Worksheets, Checklists, Etiquette, Timelines, and Answers to Frequently Asked Questions

We Have A LOT of Questions After Episode 2 of The Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce!

And we’re back for week two of Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce! I love how this week we really got to learn more about the characters and what makes them tick. Last week, we watched best-selling…




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Single on Thanksgiving? Here Are Quick Answers to Your Relatives’ Most Annoying Questions

The questions arise when you’re passing the potatoes or putting out the nut cups. Are you seeing anyone special? Playing the field? When are you going to settle down?

Singles are often grilled about their personal lives in a way their married relations rarely are. When was the last time your sister and brother-in-law were asked to defend their “married lifestyle” to a table of 12?

Most of the time, the inquisitors don’t mean to make their single relations uncomfortable. They’re just curious, and maybe a little concerned. But they can still drive even the most self-possessed singleton to the cocktail cart. So, here are a few conversational exit strategies to some of the holiday’s most irritating questions.

What They Say: “Why are you single?”

What They Mean: “You’re a very appealing person, so clearly, this is a choice you’ve made.”

What You Hear: “What’s wrong with you?”

How to Respond: “I don’t know.”

This might sound weird, but I find it’s the easiest answer. Otherwise, you’re likely to start dissecting all of your psychological eccentricities, musing about whether you’re too picky or too independent, slowly shredding your dignity like a cocktail napkin. “I don’t know” stops the conversation.

What They Say: “Are you seeing anyone special?”

What They Mean: “I’m curious about your life.”

What You Hear: “Prove that you’re not a lost cause.”

How to Respond: “Not at the moment.”

Again, short and light is key. The temptation might be to give a passionate speech about how amazing your solo life is and assure your curious relative that you’re too busy with work and friends to even think about dating. That’s fine if it’s true, but oftentimes we give the “too busy” speech as a hedge against pity, bending over backwards to assure family members that our lives are deeply fulfilling, non-stop fun or both. That’s too much work, and it can also send the wrong message. Who knows? Your cousin might have a cute neighbor or co-worker she wants to introduce you to. “Not at the moment” leaves you open, but also assures your relatives that you’re not worried about your romantic future, so they shouldn’t be either.

What They Say: “Aren’t you afraid you’ll spend the rest of your life alone?”

What They Mean: “Because the idea scares the crap out of me.”

What You Hear: “I’m looking into your future, and I see a cranky hoarder with 35 cats.”

How To Respond: “I’d be more worried about spending the rest of my life with the wrong person.”

Being alone is a big fear for a lot of people, which is why many choose to settle for mediocre relationships. You may not always love being alone, but if you have been on your own for a while, then clearly, you’re not afraid of it. This is not necessarily true for the person passing you the cranberry sauce.

But again, be gentle and avoid righteous speeches, since they rarely take dinner table talk to a good place. And remember, there is one guaranteed way to change the subject: Stop answering so many questions about your life, and start asking others questions about theirs.

Sara Eckel is the author of  It’s Not You: 27 (Wrong) Reasons You’re Single. You can get a free bonus chapter of her book at saraeckel.com. You can also find her on Twitter and Facebook.

This post originally appeared on eHarmony.com.
Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Big Questions You Have To Ask Your Partner Before Marriage (If You Want To Avoid Divorce)

You don’t often hear newly engaged couples asking divorcés for marriage advice — but maybe they should.

Who better to school you on what doesn’t work in a marriage than someone who’s been there, done that, and got the t-shirt? Given that, we had to hand it to this marriage-bound Redditor who had the good sense to ask married folks and divorcés to weigh in with the conversations they wished they would have broached with their partners before tying the knot.

“Tell me your horror stories,” the Redditor bravely asked in her call-out. “Specific questions, not just money, children, sex but things that wouldn’t cross your mind until you’ve actually been married.”

Below, 11 of the most interesting responses.

1. “How does he try to make you feel loved and validated? Does it work? How do you try to make him feel loved and validated? Does it work?”

2. “Prenup or not to prenup?

3. “Do we have more than just love? I would step back from your relationship and look at the components besides love. We all like to believe ‘love will conquer all,’ but it doesn’t. It’s 100 percent necessary, but you also need trust, honesty, respect and forgiveness. Marriage is really freaking hard, especially when it has to withstand outside hardships, but if you have all four of the above, you can not only survive those things, but thrive in them.”

4. “Asking the hard questions about children is really important. Not just how many, but questions about education and religion and basic child-rearing philosophies. For school, are you thinking private, public or homeschooling? What about discipline? How do you feel about time outs, spankings and grounding?”

5. “Is your S.O. your absolute best friend? The person you respect most in the universe? If not, don’t marry them.”

6. “Are you sure you’re not just getting caught up in the hype of getting married? I’m divorced and mainly I wish I hadn’t ignored the red flags, which in my opinion, become harder and harder to recognize the closer you get to the wedding. Once you announce your engagement, your mindset turns more to the excitement of the wedding and you tend to turn a blind eye to the warning signs. Plus, the thought of canceling the wedding can be enough to convince anyone that they can somehow make it work. But trust me, divorce is harder than calling off a wedding.”

7. “Are you both completely satisfied with your sex lives? Is there anything either party wants but isn’t getting?”

8. “Ask yourselves all of these questions to make sure you’re prepared: 1. Accidental pregnancy, what do we do? 2. Fired/laid off from job, what do we do? 3. Financial crunch (car problems, medical bills, leaking water pipes, etc.), what do we do? 4. Our parents are getting old, what do we do?”

9. “I borrowed this more or less from Dan Savage: If one of us cheats, what is the outcome?

10. “One thing I wish I would have discussed with my husband is extended family dynamics. The one major problem we’ve ever had in 32 years of marriage is his family. They didn’t like me. I bent over backwards for these people and eventually won over his dad and won over his mom for the most part. His siblings and their spouses? Not so much. It caused many, many uncomfortable times for me and because my husband is super non-confrontational, he never stood up for me.”

11. “Define ‘marriage’ for yourselves. What exactly are you committing to?”

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Are You Ready To Be A Parent? Answer These 4 Questions First

You don’t really think that having kids is just about baking brownies, buying cute little clothes, going to soccer games and reading bedtime stories, right? Far from it! It can be equal parts grueling and rewarding. Dr. Phil explains there is a level of emotional, financial and physical commitment that many don’t anticipate. Ask yourself these four questions to help determine if you’re ready to become a parent.

1. Have you thought of the long-term commitment?
Are you willing to make the sacrifices of money, emotion, sleep and energy, and put much of your life on hold for decades to come? There is an implied contract with the child that you are saying, “I will be your fiduciary. I will protect you along the way.” That takes a ton of work along with sacrifice after sacrifice.

2. Have you looked at it from your potential child’s point of view?
Babies don’t have a vote, so you need to look at all your circumstances from a baby’s point of view and ask: “Would I want you to be my mom or dad?” Are you in a position to offer a stable environment emotionally and financially? If you’re not ready, it’s your job to get ready before you bring a baby into this world.

3. Are you and your partner on the same page?
Do you and your significant other have a game plan for raising the child? Have you discussed and agree on discipline, religion and education? Who will take care of the child and who will work? Figure out a plan before you get pregnant.

4. Are you having the child for the right reasons?
Have you examined why you want to be a parent? Children shouldn’t be born with a job — like saving your marriage or giving you unconditional love, if that’s what you’re thinking. Think long and hard about your true motivations.

Like Dr. Phil | Follow Dr. Phil | Be on the Show

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Questions and Answers: A Guide to Fitness and Wellness delivers the serious content you want in a Student Question and Answer format that’s fun to read and an online learning space that commands active learning. We began by collecting over 1,000 Fitness and Wellness questions asked by real students. Questions like, “How can I improve my self-esteem?” or “Do I really need 8 glasses of water a day?” introduce each section of material throughout the program. With its series of assignable videos that debunk common health and fitness myths (“Sit Ups Make Your Stomach Flatter” or “Marijuana gives you munchies”), Questions and Answers: A Guide to Fitness and Wellness grabs hold of students’ attention and doesn’t let go. The real-life behavior change case study videos found online provide students with unmatched relevance. Students click, watch, and learn as they follow real college students attempting to change their behavior for an entire semester, and hopefully for life. With its online fitness assessments, assignable interactive animations, and online labs, Questions and Answers: A Guide to Fitness and Wellness engages students like no other fitness and wellness program.
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My Man Won’t Commit, Why Not? 8 Critical Questions!

Whether you live in an area chock o’ block full of eligible males or a remote location where single men are scarce, one thing is a given.

Many men are commitment phobic. We won’t delve into the reasons here. They’re unimportant. What we will do is look for signs that he may be the right guy and then discuss tactics to encourage him to commit.

We often use a Mind Acrobatics™ photo that relaxes us as we ponder. Here’s one taken in a city where men are plentiful and women claim “they’re all either married or gay.”

2014-03-28-AB1.jpg
Photo courtesy of Adrianna Bach

Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty. I believe men and women are wired differently.

Although times and mores have changed, in general men find it much easier to engage in sex without feeling any spiritual or emotional commitment. I know that’s not always the case, but it is the more common scenario, although it’s changed somewhat with the Millennials.

When we meet someone of the opposite sex most often there’s an initial chemical attraction. But as we all know it’s only one ingredient in the complex mosaic of a relationship. Albeit an important one!

Our physical urges often cloud our cognitive reasoning. As a coach I’m so often distressed by the frustration of my clients. They describe a seemingly perfect match, but are unable to move the relationship to the next level.

This is when we engage in a variety of introspective questions to help us clarify the quality of the relationship and its impact on the individual.

These are a just a few of the questions I often ask:

1. “How strong is the physical chemistry on a scale of 0 – 10?”
2.”How comfortable and good does he make you feel about yourself?”
3. “How much of the real “me” do you share when you’re together?”
4.”In an emergency how do you feel he would respond?”
5.”What kind of father would he make?” Even if children are not part of the equation.
6.”What are the three qualities he possesses that you most admire?”
7.”What would your answer be if he asked you to marry him tomorrow?”
8.”What makes him the right man for you?” Describe this in one sentence.

The point of the above is to help you assesses if this is a guy who has as close to
‘it all’
as can be reasonably expected.

If the answer is yes, then there are actions you can take.

Mind Acrobatics Exercise: Is He Mr. Right?

Materials & Time Required

Comfortable clothing
Writing instrument and paper or journal
Comfort Food
Peaceful location to sit or recline
Twenty uninterrupted minutes

Part #1

Take your paper and draw a vertical line down the page.
On the left hand column write “What I like most about (insert name) ”
On the right hand column write “What (insert name) does that frustrates and annoys me most!”

Part #2

1. Make yourself comfortable.
2. Take 5 slow breaths.
3. Munch on your snack.
4. Be aware of the moment and relax. Imagine you are on a tropical isle.

2014-03-28-ab26.jpg
Photo courtesy of Adrianna Bach

5. For the next 15 minutes write in pure stream of consciousness on both columns.
6. Don’t over think. Don’t censor. Just record whatever comes to mind.
7. Stop when it feels appropriate.
8. Put the list away to look at later.

In a day or two when you have some down time take out the list. Look carefully and cross out all you feel is unimportant to you.

Now with an open mind look at what you have recorded. If you find that the plus column far outweighs the minus column… you’ve got something to work with.

Ask yourself “What do I think is stopping him from taking our relationship further?” What if anything comes to mind?

You may discover there seems to be no logical reason that he doesn’t want to commit.

That’s O.K. and not uncommon.

No, you can’t pressure or cajole a guy into commitment. Yes, you can have a bit of fun and get some valuable insight into your relationship.

Prepare a piece of paper just like above but insert your name in the two columns. The next time you see your guy tell him you just completed a COSMO survey. He’ll believe that:)

Ask him to take it and say you’ll have fun comparing notes later.

Then give him some space.

If he’s a communicative kind of guy he’ll be willing to participate. If he’s not, you’ve got a great clue staring you in the face.

When the time and mood is right enjoy a cup of coffee or glass of wine as you review the exercise together.

When you’re finished, if all goes positively as planned, simply say “that was fun wasn’t it” and move on to another topic or activity.

Say no more about it. Let him ruminate, cogitate and evaluate.

What’s written below is only if you have been dating for some time, feel you really want to test the waters and are willing to accept the results. It’s risky. I suggest speaking with a life coach, therapist or confidant before trying this! If the thought of his possibly breaking up with you is unacceptable absolutely don’t engage in the following!

Game playing… not something I usually advocate… however the results can be revealing!

Call him the next day and say you are aggravated. A family commitment came up and you won’t be available for about a week but look forward to seeing him soon. Set a date and time when you’ll meet.

You are now in control of the destiny of the relationship.

When next you meet, if he’s in the right place for commitment there’s a good chance he will take a step forward in the relationship. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. If he doesn’t make a move then he may not be the right guy for you. You can’t be sure though.

Is there a risk he will have found some other woman while you were not available? Absolutely!

However, if he’s ‘the one’ he’ll be chomping at the bit with the realization of just how much he wants you.

After that it’s like all of life, a crap shoot. Hopefully things will progress and he’ll feel comfortable taking the relationship to the next level.

If he doesn’t, take charge of your life. Decide to stick it out for awhile if that works best for you.

Or, don’t be afraid of letting go both physically and emotionally. Move on to a new chapter. Yes it can be scary. But then again it may be a great adventure and who knows what diamond in the rough you may find! Life transformation is invigorating!

I’d like to add one more thought. Relationships usually aren’t easy. They take time, commitment, accommodation and flexibility. But once you’ve reached a decision to leave work diligently at emotionally separating.

It’s much easier to stop seeing someone than it is to keep yourself from ruminating about them. There is no magic pill to simply forget a guy you believed was the love of your life.It may feel agonizing for some time. It goes with the territory of serious dating.

However, you can make an aggressive attempt to put him out of your thoughts. Take control!

Good luck and I hope you find a fulfilling, satisfying relationship with a combination of chemistry, caring and loving.

Consider sharing this article with a daughter, granddaughter, niece or any loved one. It’s never too early to learn how to manage healthy relationships.

2014-03-28-ab11.jpg

Please feel free to comment and share your experiences. I reply to all article posts.


Excerpted from the forthcoming book: Comfy In My Skin… Transformation From The Inside Out! By Dave Kanegis

Follow Dave Kanegis on Facebook Mind Acrobatics™

Earlier on Huff/Post50:


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How To Ask These 5 Awkward Wedding Planning Questions

By Laura Fredricks for Bridal Guide

Need to ask your parents for money or your ‘maids to spring for a pricey frock? Here, “ask expert” Laura Fredricks shows you how to get the answers you want to hear.

In wedding planning, as in life, there are uncomfortable topics you have to cover, so knowing the right way to ask (instead of argue) for things gives you a way to resolve any possible ripples before they become tidal waves. When the asking is out of the way, there’s more time for enjoying, celebrating and making memories. Isn’t that what your big day is supposed to about? Here, some ideas.

How to ask your guests to travel for a destination wedding:

Asking your friends to get on board with this can be difficult. Between time off from work and the cost of travel and lodgings, a lot of friends and family might find it difficult and expensive to attend. It’s ideal to give your potential guests as much notice as possible. Read our destination wedding countdown calendar.

You could start by saying, "We would love to have you help us celebrate and I know this will require extra time and money on your part. Do you think you could make a vacation around the wedding? I’m sure we can work with the hotel to get you extended nights at our wedding rates." 

How to ask for someone not to be in your bridal party:

It’s no secret that with two sets of families involved, assumptions will be made that might not necessarily mesh with your big-day plans — but what do you do when a friend assumes she’ll be part of the bigger festivities? Instead of hoping and praying your friend will understand, get in front of the conversation and say, "I would have loved to have a larger bridal party, but I hope you can support our decision to keep it small — I’m asking that this not jeopardize our friendship." Read how to choose your bridesmaids.

Reinforce how important your friend is to you and ask her to participate in another special wedding activity, emphasizing how much that would mean to you. Not everyone will understand but by asking for their support, you can feel good that you recognized a friend’s feelings and want to remain close. 

How to ask parents to help pay for some of the wedding costs:

Asking parents for money on your special day is such a sensitive issue because no one wants to deter from the happiness of getting married by focusing on money. The best way to keep the “wedding bliss” while addressing the money realities is to lead with the things you are paying for and ask for the money to cover what’s left. See the traditional wedding budget breakdown. 

For example: "Mom/Dad, you know we couldn’t be happier at this time in our lives. We’re going to have the wedding of our dreams, but we’re feeling the financial pressure between the caterers, flowers, bridesmaids’ dresses and limousines. Would it be possible for you to pay for the rehearsal dinner? We kept the wedding party to our closest friends and family and we can work with the site on the menu so that it won’t cost a fortune." 

How to ask your parents/in-laws to cut the guest list:

The hardest part in planning any wedding is keeping everyone happy, and it seems as if that’s nearly impossible when creating the guest list. Everyone has their own definition of what makes up a "short guest list". One approach may be to recognize your parents/in-laws’ excitement to share your wedding with everyone but explain to them that you’ve always envisioned your big day as something small and intimate. Read how to get your guest list under control.

In that case, you may ask, "It is wonderful that you want to invite so many friends to share in our special day but my dream has always been to keep it on the smaller side. I’m so happy we are planning this as a family — can we work together to keep the list a bit shorter? I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings but I would rather have a smaller, more intimate ceremony." 

How to ask your bridesmaids to spend some hard-earned cash:

Many bridesmaids may not have extra cash to spend, particularly if they are a student, recently out of work or have debt or other family obligations. The best thing a bride can do is ask her bridesmaids to spend a little of their own money, while helping them look for ways to save at the same time. Get solutions for the biggest bridesmaid dilemmas.

Try saying "I know all this adds up to a lot of money and the last thing I want to do is put my friends and family in financial hardship. We’re happy to help with your [select any of the following that fits into your budget] travel expenses, hair and makeup costs for the big day or the cost of your dress." 

Author, speaker and Expert on the Ask, Laura Fredricks has shared her expertise in The Wall Street Journal and other publications.

More from Bridal Guide:

Keep in touch! Check out HuffPost Weddings on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. Sign up for our newsletter here.

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All of Your Embarrassing Bikini Wax Questions, Answered!

All of Your Embarrassing Bikini Wax Questions, Answered!The best advice we can give you: start now – whether you choose waxing, laser, electrolysis, or another long-lasting hair-removal method. And if waxing is your choice, then you're in luck, since we tapped Noemi Grupenmager, CEO and founder of Uni K Wax Centers, to answer the questions you might not want to ask your friends or your mom (yeah, we all get itchy down there sometimes). POPSUGAR: What is the best way to avoid ingrown hair? Noemi Grupenmager: If you wax regularly, you'll lower your chance of getting an ingrown hair.



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The 3 Most Important Questions You Could Ask Yourself When You’re Stressed

Do you secretly thrive on stress?

While none of us would like to openly admit it, we sometimes indulge in the feelings that come from a tense situation. Whether it’s pushing our work back until we’re on the brink of a deadline or even just immersing ourselves in a friend’s personal drama — we all get a motivating energy from the adrenaline-pumping emotions that come with a high-risk situation.

While research has proven that a little stress may actually be a good thing, like anything else, too much of it can have its damaging effects. Heidi Hanna, a fellow at the American Institute of Stress and the author of Stressaholic: 5 Steps to Transform Your Relationship with Stress, says that many of us even can form a stress addiction. “When it comes to stress, there’s a chemical response happening in the brain that keeps us amped up and we become reliant on that stimulation,” Hanna tells The Huffington Post. “It can become like any other addiction. We are hardwired to be overstimulated.”

So how do we move beyond our natural tendency to feed into stress? When it comes to managing its energy, whether it’s an overwhelming negative or a little motivational, there are simple coping mechanisms we can employ so our brains stay flexible during times of trepidation. Below find three questions Hanna suggests asking yourself when you’re feeling stressed in order to get yourself back on track.

1. “Is this stress I’m feeling mine or someone else’s?”
stressed people

At the first signs of stress, we should identify the source of the energy right away, Hanna says. Are you stressed because of your own situation or is that energy really coming from somewhere else? By possessing an awareness of the source, we’re able to target how to handle it. “It’s important to understand that we do pick up stress from other people because the brain is so sensitive to our environment,” she explains. “We notice someone’s breath rates or that they’re talking really quickly and we pick that up and mirror that.”

2. “Am I able to help?”
stress

Once you’ve identified where the stress is coming from, the next way to handle it is to realistically asses whether or not you’re able to help or change the situation. If the negative energy is a result of other people and you’re suffering from secondhand stress, Hanna says you need to realize there is only so much you can feasibly do in order to dissolve it.

That goes for your own stress and the stress caused by others. “Having a go-to trick to manage stress is common sense but it’s not always common practice,” she advises. “We’d all love to help everybody but if we’re feeling drained, it’s just not always possible. It’s important at the first sign of stress that you have go-to strategies, like practicing gratitude. It allows your brain to stay more flexible so you can think more positively.”

3. “What boundaries do I need to establish?”
relaxing in office

When dealing with stress, particularly in the workplace, Hanna suggests establishing your own sacred spaces or breaks. Going for a walk, taking a few minutes for some breathing exercises or even just grabbing a coffee can allow you to remove yourself from the situation and help you avoid expanding your stressful thoughts. “Be protective of your boundaries. That recovery time is just as important as any other appointment or meeting you schedule throughout your day,” she explains.

Overall, when it comes to overcoming your attraction to stressful energy, Hanna says it’s all about training yourself just as you would for any other routine or habit. “Think of relaxation training like training any other muscle in the gym,” she advises. “Most of us have unknowingly trained ourselves to be dependent on stress and now is the time to change that.”
GPS for the Soul – The Huffington Post
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10 Questions Your Partner Still Needs To Answer

You’ve covered the hot-button topics: child-rearing philosophies, the true meaning of Christmas, your feelings about cilantro. But at a certain point, every couple needs to have the really tricky conversations.

By Amy Shearn

1. Why did you take so long to ask me on a second date?

In the beginning of a relationship, you don’t want to seem needy or nosy. Certain topics are simply not your business (not yet, anyway). So when Ed waited a few months to call you after the two of you met at a friend’s party, you assumed he had been seeing someone else. But you didn’t ask about it. You just went to dinner with him. Over time, you got to know one another. You grew closer. Your businesses mingled, and soon you were ” RachelAndEd.” As in, your friends say, “Who else should we invite? What about RachelAndEd?” Which is when it is finally the time to fill in the blanks, and ask what happened in that months-long gap between the first enchanting conversation by the guacamole bowl and when he actually called to see if you wanted to get dinner. Ed’s answer — he wanted to make sure your mutual friend was okay with his asking you out — could surprise you. And make you love him even more. As if that were possible.

2. What beloved dinner do you no longer love?

I was bursting with pride the first time I made my husband dinner and he adored it. The dish was called… drum roll, please…chicken and broccoli on rice. The secret ingredient is — shhh! — soy sauce. Actually, after the chicken and broccoli and rice, soy sauce is the only other ingredient. This meal has taken us through the lean years of graduate school (more rice than chicken), through times when we both worked full time (more chicken than rice), through our childrens picky-eating stages (hold the sauce). And then came the day that so many marriages eventually face. He looked at the chicken and broccoli and rice and couldn’t bring himself to eat another bite. I can’t blame him. I felt the same way. So don’t waste a perfectly good plate of bland food by failing to inquire: What dinner did he once love that he would now prefer never to eat again? And then, you tell him yours. This is a safe place. Get it out. You might just be saving your marriage from drowning…in soy sauce.

3. What do you think of therapy?

When the big things come up — career strife, dying family members, the various typical but nevertheless excruciating heartbreaks of everyone’s life — you need to know if talking to someone is an option. Is he up for bringing in outside help for the two of you, or even just the one of you (if that one needs it)? Or will he say, “Psychotherapy? Like for crazy people? Doesn’t that cost an awful lot?” Some people find clarity in talking out the big issues with an objective outside party. Others see the whole enterprise as futile, or invasive. It’s a conversation to have before you’re at that completely-overwhelmed-something’s-gotta-give point, when you’re still talking about the idea of therapy and not about the personal issue you can hardly think your way through.

4. What’s the number you’re not sharing?

His student-debt balance, his weight before you met, his 545 dusty Star Wars collectors’ items, his 3.2 gray hairs, the 365 letters to the editor he sends every year, his actual desired number of children, his 17 identical shirts… There is likely some number you don’t know about. It might be intimidating. It might be relieving. Either way, it’s bound to be revealing.

5. How are we going to take care of your parents?

No one wants to, but at some point we all have to put on our big-girl pants and manage to make a will, consider our future funerals, alert spouses to our feelings on plug-pulling. Maybe you’ve even thought about what will happen as your parents age, whether you’ll install some bars in your bath tub or rack up frequent-flyer miles. But have you two discussed what will happen as his parents age? (Bet you never thought about that one, did you?) Much has been written about the difficulties of caring for an elderly parent, but less about when the elderly (and often persnickety, uncomfortable, dissatisfied) parent is not yours. Are you in assumed line to be the de facto care giver for your already-crabby mother-in-law? Are you headed toward an argument with your husband’s sister about the merits of nursing care? Put a plan in place now for a smoother road ahead.

6. What’s boring you about your life?

The authors of the book The Normal Bar, an extensive survey on romantic relationships, found that “boredom was the reason 71 percent of unfaithful men and 49 percent of the women gave for acting on sexual temptation.” So please, yes, find out if he’s bored in bed. But also know what’s boring him about life in general. Have your weekends become a tedious tangle of other people’s agendas — children’s birthday parties, neighborhood obligations, lawn care, children’s birthday parties, oh and children’s birthday parties? Is he so sick of his pants he groans whenever he takes another pair of khakis out of the drawer? To paraphrase Mary Oliver, this is your one wild and precious life, people, and there is no time for the guy you love (or you) to be bored by pants.

7. If you could have any car in the world, what would it be?

Hey, you’re grown-ups. This might actually be within reach.

8. Can you smell this peanut butter?

Sounds strange, but a loss of the ability to smell may signal a larger health issue. Surely I don’t have to remind you that the ability to smell is associated with the first cranial nerve (all right, I only learned that two seconds ago). This explains why that guy I knew in college lost his ability to smell in a car wreck — apparently head trauma often damages this first cranial nerve. This also explains why smell is one of the first senses affected by cognitive decline. In fact, graduate students at the University of Florida McKnight Brain Institute Center for Smell and Taste have found a link between a patient’s ability to smell and early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. (They used peanut butter because it is an easy-to-access “pure odorant.”) While we don’t recommend self-diagnosing based on this early study, sniffing some PB with your S.O. may pave the way for some important conversations about health — yours, his, individual family histories and potential future shared histories.

9. If you could change one thing about your job, what would it be?

We all have our moments of career malaise. But when it’s not your own career, not your own malaise, it’s difficult to know what to say, other than, “Oh… Yeah… Man. That stinks. Sorry.” A more manageable way to discuss this is to start with specifics: What does your partner wish were different at work right now? What doesn’t your partner like? This avoids that big question: Do you want to quit and find a totally new career path? But it still gets him thinking, helps him list the things he actually wants to do and offers you insights into your partner’s unspoken life.

10. What’s the one (doable) thing you wish I’d stop doing?

Considering all the ways in which you might be annoying the bejesus out of your partner can be a little terrifying. Certainly, we could all be better people, better partners. I would like to be a kinder, more patient and giving person who is about 5 inches taller. There are other smaller things I do actually have control over, however, that I could actually change. For example, the tea bags. I am perpetually leaving old tea bags on the counter. My husband finds the resulting slimy counter-slugs to be most repellent, and is constantly saying, in a pointed, exaggeratedly patient way, “Are you done with this tea bag?” Perhaps, as a kind of gift to him, I could give him a weeklong reprieve. Tea bags will be doomed to immediate interment in the trash the moment they have finished steeping. This wild, new habit would not ever become my new state of being, we both know me too well by now to expect that. (After all, dunk that shriveled, secondhand tea bag in boiled water and you’ve got a perfectly acceptable cup of tea, and I mean, what, does he think tea grows on trees?) But it’s something I could do for a week, if it would make him happy. What’s the one tiny week-shift that could relieve some pressure; show, if nothing else, that you’re willing to try, willing to listen. You know whom to ask. Go, ask him.

Amy Shearn is the author of The Mermaid of Brooklyn: A Novel.

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The Ultimate Questions Book – Wellness: A Coach’s Guide to Unlock Client Potential

The Ultimate Questions Book – Wellness: A Coach’s Guide to Unlock Client Potential


Asking powerful questions shifts the way we approach problems by creating curiosity and engaging creativity, leading to solutions. The quality of the questions we ask directly influences the actions we take. It’s not just about what you ask, but how you ask the question that gets results. High quality questions clarify, evaluate, probe, prioritize, define choice, address obstacles and create a vision. The right question can make all the difference. The Ultimate Questions Book on WELLNESS is one in a series of books containing high quality questions that are designed for specific coaching categories to help coaches, health care professionals, personal trainers, and mind-body practitioners get to the heart of the issue fast. Inside you will find hundreds of questions, examples of when to use specific types of questions, a WELLNESS Wheel with Lists of Questions under each Wheel Quadrant, WELLNESS Quotes, An Open & Closed-Ended Questions List, How to Design SMART Goals, and a WELLNESS Values List. This book goes beyond having a list of possible questions. Although this book is designed around how to ask a question and what questions to ask that’s not all you will receive. The information and resources found in this book can also help you develop your business through: Designing Your Signature Program Generating Product & Program Ideas Creating Evaluation Tools Workshop & Seminar Development Inspirational Incentives for Your Clients Prospect Pre-qualification Content for Newsletter & Articles Content for Social Media Marketing & Blogging

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Website Design and Development: 100 Questions to Ask Before Building a Website [With CDROM]

Website Design and Development: 100 Questions to Ask Before Building a Website [With CDROM]


The book is comprised of a series of questions about the reader’s website, with answers averaging 3-5 pages in length. The answers will be liberally illustrated and will contain short prescriptions at the end – action points – with comments about what it will take to do the job: need to hire? Could be learned easily, etc. Each question will also have a rating on a scale of 1 – 5 showing how important it is to the welfare of the site, allowing people to pick and choose where to spend their time and money. Questions will be divided into topic chapters (such as Domain Names, Content, Design, etc.), and they will be labeled and "indexed" according to several sub-checklists. For example, there will be a Search Engine Optimization list, so that a person could quickly find all questions in the book that related to SEO issues. One of the Appendixes at the back of the book will contain instructions for actions people will need to take in order to answer some of the questions – such as how to view source code in your browser (these actions would then be highlighted in the text so they would know to look in the appendix). Unique to the book, the author advises the reader how often a task needs to be repeated: daily, weekly, monthly, in order to maintain the site. The book will cover; Domain Names, hosting, Design & Layout, Construction, Content Quality, Content Management, User Experience, Marketing and Promotion (a unique, value-add to the book), Search Engine Visibility, Statistics and Security, Appendices: Basic Concepts and Tools for Understanding Your Site, Online Resources, and a Glossary. The instructional video will tackle, in a step-by-step fashion some of the more complex and visually oriented topics in the book.
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